A Call for Decency on #Social Media

decency“If you can’t say something nice, don’t say nothing at all.” – Said by mothers everywhere, to include Thumper’s mom in Bambi.

I remember, several years ago (okay, really, it’s been decades), my youngest brother and his pal were teasing a kid behind his back. My mom overhead the two, and asked my brother, “How do you feel, knowing you could be the reason someone is crying in their pillow tonight?”

How’s that for a “make-you-think” moment?

I am not sure when it happened, or why, but negativity and nastiness is thriving across the lines of social media, rearing its ugly head in comment sections; personal attacks are found under articles and blogs posted online, in tweets and on Facebook. Like a fungus given the perfect humid conditions, the rudeness keeps growing and festering, bringing itself to a new level – almost daily.

Here are two examples that happened within the past month or so. These are the condensed versions of the posts (links provided), but you’ll get the gist:

  • A public relations executive tweeted a snarky comment about race and catching AIDS on a trip to Africa.
  • A reporter tweeted about the tainted-water crisis in West Virginia, and how they can now work on incest.

Let’s see here: The public relations executive, a high-profiled professional in her field, dealing with social media daily, should have known better. The reporter, discussing a very serious, potentially deadly situation, should have known better. These people have a good number of followers. They are educated. Sadly, they are not alone.

Maybe they thought they were being witty. Maybe they wanted their comments to “go viral.” Maybe they believed that their words wouldn’t follow them.

Maybe they are completely wrong.

Sure, they tweeted out their obligatory apologies. But the damage was done. Once a person puts something out on social media, it is there to stay. It doesn’t matter if you delete your post or comment, there is a good bet that someone has taken a screen shot and propelled the nasty sentiments even further into cyberspace.

Apparently, getting behind a computer screen, a smart phone or some other device makes one bullet-proof? Yeah…no. Maybe that was true back when people disguised themselves under a different handle (and we know how well that worked for a White House staff member a few months ago). To further my point, go read an article on any news website, and you will find nasty comments about the subject of the article, and in many cases, against the other folks commenting.

What gets into people’s heads?

Our tweens and teens sit through hours of anti-bullying classes and seminars on the proper etiquette of social media. What’s the point, when professionals in high-powered careers – those who should know better – negate everything that is taught? What a great example they are setting… not.

I enjoy social media, when it is used properly. It is great to connect to family, friends and business associates who are literally around the world. But it gets tiresome to see the misuse, the nastiness, the passive-aggressive posts and the drama.

If a commenter or poster had to look a real, live person straight in the eye, would the improper, personal attacks and vicious posts and tweets ever get posted?

Please, think before you speak… and post, tweet or publish.

You just don’t know how it may come back to haunt you, and worse, how it could hurt someone else.

© Lynne Cobb – 2014

Have you noticed an uptick in the nastiness in social media? Let me know in the comment section. If you like this post, feel free to share it with others (links to share are listed below).

 

13 Replies to “A Call for Decency on #Social Media”

  1. Great post, Lynne. I am in complete agreement with you. This is certainly a different environment now, than when we grew up. I hope this issue with social media gets better, but I have my doubts. It’s even more important now for “good parenting” to prevail!!

  2. Indeed! I agree with this very much. I try really hard not to get into arguments on the internet or engage with people negatively. Sometimes I slip, but I am definitely trying.

  3. My mom always said the same thing and it’s actually a very good rule of thumb. I’m horrified by some of the things I read on Social media. I really try to be respectful, even if I have a strong POV.

    1. Claudia, thanks for reading and posting a comment. I think if people would be respectful and not vicious, and agree to disagree, it would go a long way to being civil! And, personal attacks need to go away!

  4. I agree — the Internet makes it easy for people to remain anonymous, or to hide behind a computer monitor while hurling insults or pontificating on things they should keep to themselves or share only with close friends. One of the reasons I quit Facebook is that it seemed to bring out the worst in some people — and actually made me like them less. Face to face, people tend to behave better. Though I do worry that basic social skills and civility are going the way of the manual typewriter — and the Internet isn’t helping.

  5. Pingback: T’was the Night before the Election - Lynne CobbLynne Cobb

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