“Knowledge is good.” Emil Faber – Faber College – Animal House
This morning, as I was drinking my lemon water (I read online that this is good for you), I started reading all kinds of neat new tricks for every ailment and flaw under the sun. As the last shot of lemon water sent a sour shiver down my spine, I reached for the coffee, and then started my routine of quenching my thirst for knowledge.
My readers know that I research everything before posting what has worked for me. So for the good of all humanity, I will try just about anything within reason. I am a sucker for click-bait. Oh the shame I feel for admitting this. I know better, really I do, and hard as I try, I can’t help myself. I’ll read anything, from health info to DIY to “easy recipes.” I have been drinking in and soaking up information like a mad woman. FYI: This morning, I took an online quiz which assures me that I am 99.7% mentally healthy. If that doesn’t give merit to my posts, I don’t know what will.
I just can’t help myself. I tempt fate each time I click an article stating, “Four hacks that will blah blah blah.” (Seriously, if I see “hack” in another headline I will yack.) And yet I rationalize my behavior: what if I don’t read this gem, and I miss the kernel of knowledge that leads me to the fountain of youth? Or a great place to visit? Or makes me healthy without exercise while I eat gelato?
Anyhow, the other day I found a video that shared the secret to fuller-looking hair. Click. I got sucked into watching this one. Why? Quite simply it is because I can’t spend the day wondering what I missed. For about a minute I listened to a “pre-poo” treatment (read: before shampooing). The next morning, I slathered coconut oil all over my head, sat down with my lemon water and started reading more ways to improve my writing, blogging, relationships, finances, long-term marriage and more. Ah, the euphoric wave of self-improvement is energizing. Or was it the lemon water? Whatever is was, it was time to put the device down. My 30 minutes of pre-conditioning was over.
Heading to the shower, I glanced in the mirror and my remorse began. My hair looked reminiscent of my teenage years – oily, stringy and disgusting. An odd, internal warmth began to rise, and I wasn’t sure if I was feeling a panic attack or a hot flash – both which are brought on by stress. What have I done??? It was time to see if this latest
self torture experiment was going to work.
Using my paraben-free shampoo (because I read online that chemicals are bad), I started shampooing my hair.
I whispered an expletive, as I didn’t want to wake everyone by yelling. (I read online somewhere you shouldn’t scare people out of a dead sleep.) My hair wasn’t squeaky clean. At all. It was akin to water running off a duck. Another round of lather, rinse, repeat. And other. Until – finally – my hair was clean. Now, not only was I running late, I was also running out of hot water and shampoo.
I know, I know, there are way more problems in the world today than whether or not I have: 1) clean hair; 2) full-bodied hair; 3) no shampoo. But everything is a learning experience when you devote yourself to, um, experiments.
My take away is that the pre-conditioning worked, but I definitely need to plan ahead next time. (I read that online).
Also, I need to pay attention to the weather. After my initial panic, I ended up with a good hair
day morning. Yay! Except we had snow and sleet, which, in turn, became a bad hair day for me as I was pelted with freezing rain while scraping the ice off the car windows.
In the end, I believe the tiny shards of ice were good for my lovely locks. Melting, they turned to rain water, which is good for rinsing your hair.
And I know it must be true. I read it online.
© Lynne Cobb – 2015